New Flash! Time Doesn’t Heal All Wounds!

BoatStop

(This is the third in a series of five posts on trite sayings leaders should abandon. Here are links to the first, second, fourth and final posts).

This trite saying needs abandoning because it’s flat out untrue. If you want to use this saying, you might as well also maintain the world is flat and sun revolves the earth.

Here’s the third saying: “Time heals all wounds.”

No. No it doesn’t. Time itself doesn’t heal anything. And all wounds are not healed over time.

As time passes, the intensity of most emotional wounds dissipates. Some emotional wounds even become faded memories. Others, seemingly forgotten, are painfully awakened from time to time.

But they are not all healed over time.

Here’s what’s crazy about the saying: I don’t know anyone who actually believes time heals all wounds. Life experience tells us this. If we haven’t learned it from personal experience, we learn it from the trials and tribulations of others.

Yet leaders still use the phrase. Maybe they grasping at something, anything, to provide comfort. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Still, we can do better.

We really need to stop using the saying because someone might someone might believe it. Setting people up for painful disappointment would only deepen the injury.

Since we all know it’s not true, the saying is really a throwaway line. Some people say it so they can end an uncomfortable conversation. It’s better to say nothing than use a cheap saying to brush off someone’s pain.

We would be much better off replacing the saying with something like:

“Time will ease the pain.”
“In time you’ll see this differently.”
“Time helps.”

From a Christian perspective, we can share confession can provide healing (James 5:16). God provides a spiritual gift of healing (I Corinthians 12:9). God comforts us in our pain (2 Corinthians 1:3-5). God does, at times, heal us (Psalm 147:3). Certain God walks with us in our pain (Hebrews 13:5).

That said, understand this. Nowhere does the Bible say all our wounds will be healed this side of heaven.

This is one saying that should be lost to the sands of time. Just let it go.

What trite saying would you like to see abandoned? Share it in the comments or shoot me an email. Here are the other posts in this series:


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